🤔A very strange question! 😳 Does religion value a person’s freedom of choice?! #PnOnFreedomOfChoice @PanahianEN

❗️Can I push my child to pray at any cost? Paying attention to freedom of choice is not only important in social and political matters; it should be discussed in family training too. Religion does not allow us to invite others, even to do good deeds, using psychological pressures!   Many of Islam’s teachings and beautiful morals, such as piety, show the importance of freedom of choice. Piety, which has been stressed so much in Islam, comes from within and has meaning if people have the right to choose. If a servant chooses to go toward God himself, God honors and rewards him. In the family and at school, help children know the value of freedom of choice so they won’t be easily influenced by others, by encouragements or by punishments. Most children will choose well if they know the value of freedom of choice. If a child grows up under psychological pressures, such as being ridiculed at home, he may misbehave in society later due to a fear of his friend’s ridicule, because his independence has been damaged in the family. If you keep frightening your child, he may take unlawful sustenance in his work later due to a fear of poverty. Or if you encourage him too much and spoil him causing him to feel a constant need for affection, he may misbehave later due to a little encouragement from others. Imam Baqir (as) said, “If you get happy when the people in your city say, ‘You are a good person,’ you are no longer one of our friends (because people can mislead you with their encouragement). Or if you get upset when the people in your city say, ‘You are a bad person’, you are not one of our friends.” [Tuhaf al-Uqul, p. 284] If people can change your behavior with a few words, you are weak and cannot use your freedom of choice properly. You must find the correct path yourself. Discernment and mental strength are necessary tools for freedom of choice so we won’t be influenced by others. Consider the question, “Should I push my child to pray at any cost?” No, if we help our children to realize the value of freedom of choice, to use freedom of choice properly and to not be influenced by pressures from others, they will pray themselves. #PnOnFreedomOfChoice @PanahianEN

👊🏼 Does religion force people? 🤔 Why do we feel that God is forcing us? #PnOnFreedomOfChoice @PanahianEN

☑️ Parents! Let your children choose! One of the positive effects of paying attention to freedom of choice is that when a person chooses by himself with awareness and alertness, he stands by his choice and endures the hardships on this path better. When a person doesn't choose something himself, the difficulties bother him very much and he gives up in the middle of the way. When we want to train our child to pray, we must first work on his/her spiritual independence and freedom of choice. Let's tell our children, “You have the freedom to choose whether you want to pray early or late, or even not to pray! Those who did not choose to pray it was because of these reasons, and those who chose to pray it was because of these reasons. See the results they got based on their choice.” We must teach children they have a freedom of choice and help them to gain the ability to choose, since they must make choices. This is the most beautiful, outstanding part of religion. Being religious has some hardships. One has to pass up some things. Not being religious also has hardships, but not being religious is more difficult. Tell your children, “Being irreligious has some enjoyments. If it didn't have any enjoyments, people wouldn't go toward being irreligious! So, it definitely has some enjoyments. But religion has much more enjoyments, and so on.” Tell them these things so that they can choose based on their awareness. It is good for parents to show their decision-making and the moments when they are choosing to their child. They should think out loud about the difficulties they have in choosing, so that the child can be informed that mom and dad have an issue called "choosing!" They think about their decision, and they hesitate before making a choice. Finally, they choose with caution. In this case, the child learns to think when choosing too. Let your children think and choose when they want to get married. Don't push them. Don't try to talk and prepare the environment in such a way that they feel they have no choice in the matter, or they won't feel responsible and won't tolerate the hardships that arise in the future. #PnOnFreedomOfChoice @PanahianEN

🐬You’re not a dolphin, are you?! A person must be himself before he can be good, and he must have an independent personality before he can be religious. Religion first makes a person independent, and then it helps him to grow. Independence (having an independent personality) is the foundation of religion. Therefore, the Almighty God waits to give the rewards for our deeds in Purgatory and on the Resurrection Day. That is, He usually delays the rewards until then, so that our independence will not be disturbed. If there are rewards and punishments in this world, they usually come from “where one does not expect!” [Qur’an 59:2] Why is it like this? It is so that our minds do not become caught up with thinking about rewards. They have investigated this issue in psychological experiments. For example, they told a group, "If you solve this problem, we will give you a big prize." Another group was told, "We will give you a small prize." And another group was told, "There is no prize!" The results showed that when they set a big reward, people thought less and couldn’t solve the problem very creatively. But when there was no reward, people’s minds worked better. And when people were promised a small reward, their minds worked mediocrely. What is God's plan for prayer? His plan is this, “If you pray, I will not rain flowers on you, and if you do not pray, I will not rain bullets on you. Decide for yourself!” Why doesn’t prayer have immediate, tangible rewards and benefits? Because God wants our soul to grow. Animals are after immediate results. For example, when Mr. Pavlov (a famous psychologist) wanted to train a dog, he trained it by giving it an immediate reward. He conditioned it by saying, "Do this action to get this result, and I will give you this food." A dolphin trainer once told me, "We train the dolphins in this way that when we signal them to do something, we immediately give them a fish for them to become conditioned." When he said this, it occurred to me that many of us tell God in a similar way, "God, give me something when I pray!" But God tells us with His silence, "You’re not a dolphin, are you?!" #PnOnFreedomOfChoice @PanahianEN

👤Don’t say, “I am one, just like everyone else!” No, be yourself. 🔻Who caused Imam Husayn (as) to be alone and be martyred? One of the factors that deprives people of their independence and freedom of choice is following others for no reason. If we want to follow someone, we should have a reason. Imam Sadiq (as) said, “Avoid following after personalities. You should not make someone big and accept whatever they say other than (God’s) Guardian.” [Kafi, vol. 2, p. 298] Open your eyes. Maybe he/she is making some wrong statements in the middle of his/her words. Imam Kazim (as) said, “Don't say, ‘I am one of the people and with them.’” [Al-Ikhtisas, p.343] You should not do whatever other people do. Don't say, "Everyone acts like this, so I will do the same!" People may be making a mistake. Think a little. Maybe other people don't understand many things. You should be independent. See how enjoyable it is to be yourself and have initiative. If you want to take your child to the hospital for treatment, you will ask, “Which hospital should I take him to? To which specialist should I take him?” You should ask these questions about the religious scholars as well. You should investigate the school of thought you want to follow. For whoever you want to follow, you must have a reason for doing so. Who caused Imam Husayn (as) to be alone and be martyred? One group of people were those who came to Karbala and stood against Imam Husayn (as). The rest of the people were sitting in the city of Kufa, looking at each other and asking, "Should we go to help Husayn, or not?" When they brought the severed head of Aba Abdillah al-Husayn (as) to Kufa, some of those people rose up and were martyred. But when it was necessary for them to take action, they looked at each other and did not go to help Imam Husayn (as). When they needed to support the Imam, they looked at each other and said, "What will you do? What should I do?” #PnOnFreedomOfChoice @PanahianEN

📱Q: How can I check my child's cell phone without him/her getting upset?!   It is strength of will, "freedom of choice" and an ability to make decisions that make human beings outstanding and make it possible for their talents to flourish. Parents should realize these things to be able to know how to raise their children. Once a mother asked me, “How can I check my child's cell phone without him getting upset?” I said, “You shouldn’t check your child’s cell phone! Your child should know (meaning you should have taught him) how to use his freedom of choice properly.” Piety means learning to not abuse our right of freedom of choice. Piety means remembering there is a hidden Observer, an Observer Who does not give immediate rewards and punishments. And He has given people the ability to decide and also freedom of choice. When this ability and choice are given to someone and he feels dignified and honored, he will practice not abusing his freedom of choice. But if we keep forcing someone, whenever he gets a chance, he will escape, do something wrong and enjoy deceiving others! That which is valuable is for a person to have this freedom but not become corrupted. The peak of beauty is for a person to have power over someone but to forgive him, or for a person to have the ability to betray someone else, but he doesn’t do this. #PnOnFreedomOfChoice @PanahianEN